Image hosted by Photobucket.com
*.* Her Life Mission *.*

Name: Michelle Ruth Tong

Birthday: 3rd March

Life Mission Statement:
To be a testimony of Christ and set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity (1 Tim. 4:12). Do whatever is true, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, whatever is excellent and praiseworthy to God (Phili 4:8).



*.* Tagboard *.*



*.* My Friends *.*

Guys

Gals
*.* Special Links*.*
*.* Links *.*
*.* Archives *.*
*.* My Journey *.*

Tuesday 30 November 2004
*.* my Penang trip.. *.*

So much that had happened for the past 1 week. I just came back from Penang for a BB exchange programme. It was fun and I actually learnt the differences between Singapore and Malaysia BB.

One day before I went to Penang, I went through the toughest night I ever had. It's all over. No point hanging on. I was hoping.. So much.. He gave up so at no point I should still be holding on.

Anyway, I thank God for people around me.. For they are really nice people, when I needed them , they are there for me and they really stayed with me till late at night. I know that God love me too much that He won't let me go through this alone so He places special people in my life to see me through. I also know that a lot of people love me, they love me too much that they just pamper me. Thank you people.

I brought along all my heavy hearted there. But I thank God that it only happen all at night that my emotions would run over me. The Malaysians are really nice people. We get to eat a lot, shop a lot and we even get to go up to Penang Hill. It was the most beautiful place with cool breeze, nice scenary and I challenged myself to the trail. The trail is like a bridge, with only a cable holding it and it was of a certain height. I'm afraid of height and the bridge was pretty shaky. I was so scared that I just kept laughing and screaming.

We also went to their Botanic Garden and Youth Park. My goodness.. I was nearly attacked by a monkey. I was just looking at it and it almost wanting to attack me. Luckily my group came and the monkey was scared off. I was in great shocked. Ever heard of 'Monkeyphobia'? I think I have that.

I will be away again.. This time to Dompak and it will only be 3 days. I am looking forward for this as this is my first mission trip with YMM. God bless everyone who is going there to impact lives...

posted by Michelle at 02:17:00 | 0 comments


Saturday 20 November 2004
*.* *.*

Had been real busy lately with camps, drama, helping here and there.. I haven't really catch my breath since my camp ended.

I'm in a deep dilema. Whatever decision I make it just seem so tough. I can't breath any longer. Look, if you want me to die, just stab a knief into my heart and I'll just die once and for all. Please don't let it drag and drag. It will never end. It's just a torture for me.

To hold on or to give up? I don't know what I'm holding on to, honestly. Somehow this time out, don't seem to be a fruitful one. I'm beginning to doubt many things in my life, even God. What is His plan for me? I don't know. I am tired, very very tired. I am still hoping that things will turn out to be something new. However, on the other hand, I really don't know what I am holding on to. The person or the relationship?

I feel like giving up. Giving up on this time out, walking out of his life, never step into it again. Giving up on what? Not giving up on him but this time out, this relationship. I've never given up on anybody. No one at all in my life and I will not.

The very sad thing is I still like him. Holding on to him and making him my prayer every night. I wish he would be mine, I wish he will come back. He is like a fish. I prayed for a fish and I'm given one and so I caught it by chance, not by mistake. But the moment I lift my fishing rod up, I know I like this fish but the very fact when I see it struggle to survive, it hurts me too much that I can't help but to let it go and swim back. I have no intention to hurt it. I let it go, feeling all so sad. Hoping it will swim back to me, still praying for it.

If it comes back, it's a bonus for me, I thank God for it is His plan. But if it doesn't, I can only keep the first love and just continue to pray for it, for it's safety that God will always bless it in any other way.

Somehow, I've let it go than to give up. I wish God will tell me if he's mine, I wish God will tell me if i'm made for him. If it doesn't, just send me away or him away. Let me be the one getting hurt and not him.

I like him for who he is. I don't expect him to change for me. I cannot change him, but I can let God do the changing in me.

posted by Michelle at 22:06:00 | 0 comments


Thursday 11 November 2004
*.* *.*

Ever encounter someone who has something to tell you yet refuse to say? Or when it's your turn to tell him/her and was pestered instead?

heehee.. I just hate it when people tell me they have something to say yet they refuse to say and then make you guess and guess. It's not a fun game after all.

I'm all by myself. What a holiday. From washing clothes to cooking to cleaning up the house, all these I have to do. Arh..


EEeeeyore..........

posted by Michelle at 17:11:00 | 0 comments


Wednesday 10 November 2004
*.* *.*

eeyore - cute, blur, follower, bluey.. it's just a donkey...

posted by Michelle at 23:56:00 | 0 comments


Monday 8 November 2004
*.* care? then do it! *.*

Sometimes I wonder, why do I still care for others even when they don't appreciate it? To be real honest, I really don't like it. It seems all so not worth it.

But when I look at people who really needs my care, a hug, a word of encouragement, and the smile on their face. It is all worth it. So why so bothered with people who don't appreciate it? Then go and care for those who need it!
I care for all I care..

Care: Is an ACT, an act of ACTIONS.. it is not WORDS that meant to be SAID...

posted by Michelle at 22:55:00 | 0 comments


Sunday 7 November 2004
*.* *.*

It doesn't matter anymore if he/she doesn't appreciate my care, I'll go care for those who need my care and appreciate it...
I'm sick, tired... Bluey..........

posted by Michelle at 19:57:00 | 0 comments


Saturday 6 November 2004
*.* And do they really live happily ever after? *.*

Lately, when my friends and I were to go for movies, we will ask among ourselves, "Will the ending still be, usually, the as usual, (and the list goes on) : "And they live happily ever after. The End..."

Well, if it's not the case, then it will either the hero of the story died or the hero will be the hero throughout the show and then asking, how was he as a hero?

In life, we don't (at all) live happily ever after each time after a chapter of our life end and a new chapter begins. Maybe we will live happily ever after, in heaven... then it will be live happily, eternally, forever and ever and ever and the list goes on again.

We always go for movie to keep ourselves entertained. Look, our life can be a movie too. I should say, our life is just too dramatic. A drama needs emotions, dialogue and more. But living in this world is like making a story of our own. We ourselves are the main character, the friends around will probably be the co-actors, some maybe the "TREE", others are the extras. It's a matter how we want to classify or rather I should say, what role, character you want them to be.
Life is short, so make your story with your hands. Make your story with all your limited sources.
If i would write a story, I will want to write mine...

posted by Michelle at 22:36:00 | 0 comments


Friday 5 November 2004
*.* *.*

Has been cold here... I'm back in action to blog, to warm this place up. No updates from my tagboard as well as my entries. Hello? This blog is still here... Still writing something that I want to share. Continue to visit here ok?

Had been real busy lately with exams and some kids exam. Quite disppointing when you see all your effort seem to have gone to waste. Well, obviously I'm pretty affected by it. Probably, I am.

Here is something to share... Pretty long.. Be patient ya?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you're afraid to love a person because of friendship, you have two choices, either tell what you feel and let the love take place or hide the feelings under a friendship full of pretensions.

It's hard for two people to love each other when they live in two different worlds... but when these two worlds collide and become one, that's what you call magic!

Love can never be so beautiful without friendship... One leads to another and the process is irreversible... The best of lovers is the greatest of friends!!! I like you because you're my friend, and because you are my friend I care, and because I care, I love you. I don't love you because you are my friend; I love you because I do!

Sometimes I've asked myself, what would make me happy? To think that I have everything else, I get what I want... then I realized it was YOU, too bad 'cause it's you can't have... I can't choose who I'm gonna love, but I also can't just love who chooses to love me... And you can't blame me in choosing to love you as much as I can't blame you for not learning to love me.

I'm sorry if you can't love me the way you loved the one before me, so I'll let you go to find him/her and hope someday you'll see that the one true love you're looking for was the one who set you free...

"How can I say goodbye to someone I never had? Why do tears fall for someone who was never mine? Why is that I miss someone I was never with and I ask why I love someone who's love was never mine?"

Isn't it funny we're trying to catch the attention of the one we think we love; we hardly notice the one we're really looking for was just there. You don't notice them 'till they are in the arms of someone else... Food for thought, think of this.. Have you really cared for someone more than you expected? Have you ever tried to love him/her despite of all the pain? Will you keep on loving him/her as he/she whispers someone else's name? Will you???

It's better to lose your pride with someone you love rather than lose that someone you love with your useless pride. When you love someone, don't expect that person to love you back the same amount. One of you will be ahead, the other behind. It's either you catch up or the other waits. When you love, you must not accept anything in return, for if you do, you're not loving but Investing.

If you love, you must prepare to accept pain, for if you expect happiness, you're not loving but using... True love hears what is not spoken,and understands what is not explained, for love doesn't work in the mouth, nor the mind, but in the heart... Love is like standing on wet cement, the longer you stay the harder it is to leave... And you can never go without leaving your prints behind...

Don't love a person like a flower, because a flower dies in season. Love them like a river because a river flows forever... Love doesn't have to have a happy Ending, 'cause love doesn't have to end at all. Never be afraid to fall in love. It may hurt a lot, it may give you aches and pains, but if you don't follow your heart, in the end you will cry even more for not giving love a chance.

Love may leave your heart like shattered glass, but keep in mind that there's someone who'll be willing to endure the pain of picking up the pieces so you could be whole again" The cruelest thing a guy could do to a girl is to let her fall in love when he doesn't intend to catch her fall.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In ur life there will be one person who loved u a lot and someone whom u loved a lot and another who will be with u for the rest of ur life. So to anyone out there, don't be sad if u ever lost someone close to ur heart, because that proves that he's/she's not the one who will be with u till the end. Maybe someday u will find the one who will love u as much as u love him/her. Just treat it as an experience, a fruitful one. I've just been through a pretty bad patch, getting myself into a cycle again and again. I thought it was the end of the world. I tired many things like avoiding, shutting off from everyone but don't worry, I didn't do anything silly.

I'm out of that wilderness, all willing to accept everyone back in my life, as friends. Move on in my life and all I can do is to have faith in God and just wait on Him. I've learnt to not just let go, but also to accept all decision(s) made. It's time to pick myself up and move on. I did it! Though at times, I thought I will never be... Thanks everyone who was there and still here to be with me.

Get out and find, but don't just find, be patient and wait. Be open and willing to just let people come in and out of your life. Some may leave footprints, others just a friend or if you are really lucky, you might find the one among these friends.

I've learnt an important lesson in my life. Have you? =)

posted by Michelle at 23:36:00 | 0 comments

Get awesome blog templates like this one from BlogSkins.com