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Saturday 14 January 2006
*.* Rainbow after rain... *.*
*.* Rainbow after rain... *.*
I finally see the sunshine today! It just makes me feel a bit more sunny too. I feel happier without the rain and today is not warm. It's just the 'just nice' feeling when I walk out of school, not even perspiring (which I normally do).
Finally today is my last paper for common test. I only had 4 hours of sleep last night. I woke up early thinking that I could study a little bit more and guess what, I fell asleep the moment I look at the questions and I went back to my 'lala' land. My mum came in and thought I slept with the lights on the whole night. I couldn't really concentrate well for today's Maths paper. It's quite a killer but I managed through by God's grace and mercy. He kept me awake and my thinking gets going. I guess I won't do well this common test. I didn't study much. I reap what I sow.
Come to think about it, I guess I had been too distracted over many things these two weeks and the festive mood that got into me so sudden, I just couldn't bring myself to sit down quietly and study. This is bad but I promise to do well for my end of semester exams. Exam is just another less than 2 months time. It's going to be really stressful for me because I have 4 papers altogether.
I will be more focus this time and leave the rest to God. I've learnt about trusting God in every situation during my own devotion just now. It just tells me that though I am in the midst of my calamities and tribulation, the mind is stayed on the Lord, the heart that is fixed on the Lord will know peace.
I know I lack the peace that I needed. I need peace to think, peace to sleep, peace to do my work. I worry too much for my studies, my finances for the future, my further studies because I'm graduating real soon and my ministries. I know I can't handle them all. Not even a single one. I don't want to handle them either. It's not for me to handle. I'm learning to trust God and let God be God. Let God do what He needs to do. I know God doesn't need me at all. He is God, He can do all things by Himself. However, I know that God has a will for me, His purpose for me. I'm seeking this purpose and what is His Will for me.
I told myself I want to see lives change, then it should start with me. I want to see people know Jesus more and more, then I should know my God much more so that I can share with them. I want to see things change in cell, in youth ministry, then it all should start with me because I want to make that commitment to make a difference. Not by my strength and will, but God's.
Finally today is my last paper for common test. I only had 4 hours of sleep last night. I woke up early thinking that I could study a little bit more and guess what, I fell asleep the moment I look at the questions and I went back to my 'lala' land. My mum came in and thought I slept with the lights on the whole night. I couldn't really concentrate well for today's Maths paper. It's quite a killer but I managed through by God's grace and mercy. He kept me awake and my thinking gets going. I guess I won't do well this common test. I didn't study much. I reap what I sow.
Come to think about it, I guess I had been too distracted over many things these two weeks and the festive mood that got into me so sudden, I just couldn't bring myself to sit down quietly and study. This is bad but I promise to do well for my end of semester exams. Exam is just another less than 2 months time. It's going to be really stressful for me because I have 4 papers altogether.
I will be more focus this time and leave the rest to God. I've learnt about trusting God in every situation during my own devotion just now. It just tells me that though I am in the midst of my calamities and tribulation, the mind is stayed on the Lord, the heart that is fixed on the Lord will know peace.
I know I lack the peace that I needed. I need peace to think, peace to sleep, peace to do my work. I worry too much for my studies, my finances for the future, my further studies because I'm graduating real soon and my ministries. I know I can't handle them all. Not even a single one. I don't want to handle them either. It's not for me to handle. I'm learning to trust God and let God be God. Let God do what He needs to do. I know God doesn't need me at all. He is God, He can do all things by Himself. However, I know that God has a will for me, His purpose for me. I'm seeking this purpose and what is His Will for me.
I told myself I want to see lives change, then it should start with me. I want to see people know Jesus more and more, then I should know my God much more so that I can share with them. I want to see things change in cell, in youth ministry, then it all should start with me because I want to make that commitment to make a difference. Not by my strength and will, but God's.
posted by Michelle at
00:46:00